Chocolate Fudge and Marshmallow

July 31, 2013

Chocolate Fudge and Marshmallow

The mundane and humdrum lesson was curtailed by the ringing of a bell, signalling break time. Thank goodness! She could not even understand a single word of what the teacher had said. The only impression she had was that of the teacher pushing his thick, black-rimmed glasses up the bridge of his nose approximately every 15 seconds. As far as she could tell, her first day at school was turning out to be a nightmare. The day had started off with her parents bringing her into a classroom which consisted of all these new, strange faces. Kids of her age who had stared dumbly at her when she flashed her sweetest smile, a failed attempt to be friendly.

"Every kid goes to school, you see, to learn new things." Mummy had said, all the while reassuring her that every thing will turn out fine. "Now, now, big girls don't cry," mummy had warned upon seeing tears slowly welling up. The little girl had hastily took a few big sniffs to prevent her tears from falling then.

The scraping of chairs against the cemented floor brought back her attention. Now, she sat frozen to her chair while watching the kids around her scrambling away--putting pencils into pencil cases, placing notebooks into drawers. It was break-time after all, and she couldn't help noticing that each of the kids had a Tupperware containing some home-made sandwiches, chocolate cake with icings, and even her very favourite sushi!

"Big girls buy their own food", she sighed exasperatedly as mummy's words rang in her ears. The queue was alarmingly long. Now and then, a few big, burly guys would bump into her, almost sending her flying. She took out the notes her daddy had given her the day before while trying to squeeze her way into the crowd. A few blue ones and a green one. There were coins too. Big ones and small ones. She desperately tried to recall what her daddy had taught her about money the night before. 5 more minutes to go before the bell rings. Her stomach had begun to grumble. She could not see what was being sold, even on tip-toe. A guy bumped hard into her, again. That was the last straw. She burst into tears, right then and there. Her loud crying drew attention, and soon, a crowd of mothers huddled around her, comforting her with soothing tones.

"I....want....jie jie", she had managed between sobs and gasps. "Do you by any chance know who her jie jie is?", one auntie had turned to asked a girl who had been wearing a mischievous grin on her face ever since she squeezed through the crowd to watch the unfolding drama. "Um....actually, I'm her jie jie", the girl had replied awkwardly.

"So, what was that you wanna buy? Seeing that you'd cried so miserably, I'll help you buy it."

The little girl looked down at the tiled canteen floor and said nothing.

"Well?" Her jie jie prodded.

Slowly, with a barely audible whisper, " I want Vitagen."

The little girl could have sworn that her jie jie had rolled her eyes.

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Despite the darkness in the room, the girl had refused to switch on the light. The depressing atmosphere had been advancing slowly, swallowing all signs of positivity. Tears trickled down her cheeks. She had just came back from piano lesson. A horrible piano lesson. The piano teacher had flung her music sheet out of the piano room, rattling on and on about being disciplined and the usual "when are you going to play your pieces well" remark.

"I need to have a word with your mother", the piano teacher had said her most dreaded sentence. What her piano teacher had told her mother privately, she never know. All she knew was that her mother had lectured her endlessly on the car-ride home. About how burdensome the piano fees were. About how ungrateful and unappreciative she had been. How she did not seem to be putting in much effort in practising the piano. And finally, THAT remark came up, as it always had been. About why her sister could play brilliantly and why she couldn't. The usual "You're just not trying hard enough, as hard as your sister". Her sister. In the end, what it all boils down to was the constant comparing of her and her sister.

They would go for postal painting classes together and her sister would come back with a better painting. They would go for swimming lessons together and her sister would be the one swimming skilfully across the pool with just 20 strokes while she had to struggle with 10 strokes.They would go for birthday parties together and always, she would be shunted away in a corner while her sister could engage in a mature, grown-up conversation with the adults. They would go on a family shopping trip together and her sister would be the one getting new clothes and new shoes while she would only get pass-ons from her sister. Right. Her sister. Always the spotlight, the centre of attention. Metaphorically speaking, her sister would be the sun, and she, a tiny star. Her twinkling light would always be shielded as long as the blinding brightness of the sun was around.

Forever hidden, folded and tucked away into imaginary drawers.

That very thought hurt, a lot. It stung. Like a million daggers piercing through her heart.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sudden opening of her bedroom door.

"You know, self-pity would not help. You should probably just get out from that dark and start doing something sensible instead." That was her jie jie standing in the doorway, pretending that she could understand everything.

"Go away!" She had screamed, totally fed up with everything. Even the sight of her jie jie made her feeling worst. Perhaps it was the high pitched scream, or the anger in her eyes. Whichever it was, it had successfully shocked her jie jie into silence.

With that, a silent whisper that followed, with each and every alphabet ringing clearly in the pregnant silence, "I hate you." The girl would never have known that, at that moment, her jie jie's heart had been flung into pieces.

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High school was different than primary school. The taste of freedom, and lots of teenage dreams. Nights would be spent amidst giggles and heart-to heart talks with her jie jie.

"There's a guy that I saw today....." Dramatic pause. "O-M-G handsome!", the girl had squealed excitedly into her pillow.

"Let's see, this guy's like, what? Number 8? So far, you'd told me a list of handsome guys, which I seriously doubt. Your definition of handsome, is like so low standard", her jie jie had replied sarcastically.

Despite the sarcasm, both girls chuckled happily. One laughter was loud and easy, another one was a laugh that would give you the impression that someone was choking on something.

"You know, I'd always wanted a gor gor. A big brother", the girl had a sudden change of topic.

"Uh-huh...", her jie jie wondered what her sister was leading to.

"But then, you couldn't possibly have pillow talks with a gor gor right? That would be so...awkward. So I guess having a jie jie is better in this sense."

She wouldn't know about her jie jie, but the girl definitely slept with a smile on her face that night. A contented smile.

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Because profile pictures are way too mainstream.... Tadaaa! My very favourite picture of you! With the bunny ears! ^^V

To, da jie!
-The pretty pretty sister, who have guys waiting in line from Msia all the way to north pole.
-The crazy workaholic who just had to lock herself in the room 24/7 doing assignments.
-The scary "slave-driver" who chase after assignment datelines from her group members(seriously, I pity them LOL )
-The perfectionist who would not tolerate a small dog-eared paper and would undoubtedly bang her head against the wall even with a CGPA of 3.92 (People would seriously doubt how on earth we ended up as sisters, with so much contrast in characteristic =.=)
-The really really really generous sister who would give occasional treats, be it Starbucks coffee, sushi, Korean food, the body shop lotion, shorts, clothes, and whatever else on earth, you name it.
-The protective sister who would stand up for me when I'm being bullied or back-stabbed.

Happy happy happy happy happy happy happy happy 20th birthday!! Though we're 8 hours apart, I'm sure you can feel my sincerity all the way from here right? Touched? XDD But to make a person like you cry... ahhh well, forget it =_= My aim is not to make you grab a box of tissues anyway. Still, you can always pretend that you're moved to tears though, ya know, act, shed a few fake tears HAHA. Hmmm...I could totally write a short novel ya know teehee *thinking too highly of myself* :DD

How do u feel being 20 btw? I wouldn't know 'bout you but having an age number beginning with "2" is kinda, well, old. LOL(>.<!!!)

Anyway~~~ may you continue to stay pretty and smart and talkative and to walk closer with God (; Stop saying that you wanna be a 女强人 and stay single for the rest of your life lar. But judging from the the rate that guys from all over the planet are queueing up for you, you needn't worry(well, that's if you ever worry =.=) I know, I know, I'm really good in exaggerating right? *wink*